


saint bernard sits at the top of the driveway.

by lucidnightmares



Category: Ao Oni
Genre: Canon Compliant, Canonical Character Death, Depressing, Gen, Implied/Referenced Suicide, No Dialogue, Older Characters, Post-Canon, Short One Shot, Suicidal Thoughts, Survivor Guilt, hes around 15 in this, mention of psych ward, oh you want me to come back to ao3?? [gives you something none of you want], probably not as good as i think it is, slight vent fic, title summary n note is from saint bernard by lincoln
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-10
Updated: 2020-12-10
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:22:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 455
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27998205
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lucidnightmares/pseuds/lucidnightmares
Summary: “there’s really just one thing that we have in common;neither of us will be missed.”
Kudos: 7





	saint bernard sits at the top of the driveway.

**Author's Note:**

> “when i am dead, i won’t join their ranks, ‘cause they are both holy and free.”

Maybe.

His scarf blows in the wind and his grip on the railing loosens just a bit, but not enough for his survivor’s instinct to kick in.

The water below him, just out of reach, looks almost inviting. As if it could swallow him whole, and everything would be alright again.

_ (One life for three others.) _

He wonders, if he falls, if he takes the chance this time, what will happen.

Will he drown? Die on impact?

Will that monster emerge from the ocean and catch him in its maws?

He doubts it. He doubts he’ll have the guts to even jump this time.

But unlike the other times, he’s already taken his shoes off, and stepped over the railing.

(If he falls, will he wake up? Maybe this was one big dream. Maybe he’ll wake up in his bed, 12 years old again, and maybe he’ll get to see all of their faces again, and not just through photos.)

(Maybe he doesn’t deserve that.)

And it’s not like he hasn’t seen their faces every time his eyes close. Every time he blinks, or sleeps, or rests.

_ (Mika is limp and bloody, Takeshi’s body falls with a dull thud, Takuro begs for non-existing mercy.) _

His legs dangle, and he feels weightless. Like if he did let go of the railing, the only noise heard would be a small splash, like a pebble in a river.

He wonders if anyone will mourn him. He wonders if anyone is watching him, right now, and just isn’t saying anything. He doesn’t bother to turn his head and look.

(He wonders if any of the others are watching him, cursing him, attempting to drag him down to hell where he belongs. Or if they’re begging him to keep going, trying to drag him away from the edge.)

(He doesn’t think he’d blame them if it was the first option.)

In an alternate reality, was he the only one to die? Did his friends get out without him?

(He wishes it was this reality.)

(Does he?)

Nobody is walking on the bridge at this time. It’s so late. His parents have probably called him a million times at this point, have eaten dinner without him, and his little sister is probably asleep by now.

He’s sorry to make them worry. They’ve worried so much for him, though, so maybe it’s not that big of a deal at this point.

  
  


The night is coming to a close. He’s past curfew, at this point. He knows he is.

He lets go of the railing, and stands up. His legs feel weak, and he looks downwards.

He stares at his reflection. It stares back.

_   
~~“There’s no such thing as monsters. It’s scientifically impossible…”~~ _


End file.
